The House Republican leaders are craven halfwits:

You'll notice at no point in their new letter do House Republican Leader John Boehner (R-OH) and House Republican Whip Eric Cantor (R-VA) mention the millions of uninsured and under-insured Americans, i.e. their fellow citizens, many of whom are their constituents. Disingenuously and, given the stakes, amorally, they refer to their latest obstructionist tactic as "bipartisanship":

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/44/2010/02/top-house-republicans-throw-co.html?wprss=44

I wish it were legal by executive order for President Obama to suspend health insurance to both houses and parties in Congress until they get off their fucking asses and pass meaningful and comprehensive legislation that accords each American the basic human right not to die, get sicker, or go broke in the event of illness or injury.

Weekend recap:

• I completed my sickest weekend in several months and loathed each waking and half-slept moment of it.
• Watched two of my all-time favorites, Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle and The Graduate back-to-back last night. Awoke feeling somewhat improved. Would like to think it's their comprehensive brilliance or my aforementioned illness-loathing that prompted the symptoms to calm the hell down, though most likely the Amoxicillin kicked in.
• Did not watch the Superbowl (not that I'm a huge NFL fan, but still) because our annual condo board meeting was scheduled for kick-off time. No, really.
• Discovered at said meeting that some of my adored and respected neighbors not only wish to spend their finite seconds on earth fretting about the garage floor's cleanliness, but that they will implore others to do the same.
• Last night on the street below, two drunk guys got into a brawl, replete with pithy, alcohol-soaked exchanges like, "Fuck you, man!" "No, man, fuck you!" Then one of them looked up, saw me standing at my window and yelled, "I'm sorry! I just have to tell him this one more thing!" and hissed at the other guy, much more quietly, "I said, 'Fuck you!'" The city's genteel reputation? Intact.
  

Today's NFL memory:

I was the only girl on the block growing up so I became adept at playing touch football. When my brother and I were on the same team, he got to "be" Fran Tarkenton and I, Lynn Swann.

I developed early, however, and one day as Mom watched us play from the kitchen window, she noticed some of the fellas to whom I wasn't related were touching me a bit too long in certain places. So, she benched me.

Alas.

Hello, symptom flare-up:

Jesus fucking Christ I'm sick today.

Remember that scene in Postcards from the Edge where Dennis Quaid utters one of Carrie Fisher's best lines, that he feels like he "slept under an elephant's foot?"

It's like that, only without all the coked out anonymous sex that preceded it.

Though it'd be kinda cool if someone made my turkey, spinach and avocado sandwich for me right now:

Yesterday I wrote more than I have in any 24 hour period since he died.

Today I feel as if a meteor landed on me while I slept.

Back at the keyboard, though.

I've had worse nights.

Query:

At what point in the grief process does ice cream cease being an acceptable side dish w/ breakfast?

B/c we haven't reached it yet.

Hooray! Smith Magazine editors featured on NPR today:

Smith Magazine editors Larry Smith and Rachel Fershleiser were featured on NPR today in support of Smith Mag's new book, It All Changed in an Instant: More Six-word Memoirs (HarperCollins), as previously noted, a wry and insightful tome featuring, among others, Amy Tan, Frank McCourt, Sarah Silverman, Gloria Steinem, Andy Richter and, well, me.

Congrats again, Larry and Rachel!

The NPR feature:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=123289019&sc=fb&cc=fp

And now, congregants, let us turn to p. 22 of David Cross' I Drink for a Reason and...

...reflect upon his passage re hippies, "Maybe tax them more. Create a 'well-meaning, but actually harmful tax' so that when they advocate drinking and bathing in your urine, they also pay into a universal health-care system to offset the damage brought on by drinking and bathing in one's own urine."

Amen.

Hey, __. This one's for you:

The 82nd annual Academy Award nominations were announced this morning:

http://carpetbagger.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/02/oscar-nominations/

Better than spaghetti and puppies and ice cream combined:

Via Facebook friend Jon Auer's page:

John Paul Auer is pleased to announce: 1) The Posies will play "Frosting on the Beater" in its entirety on 4/17/10 @ The Crocodile in Seattle 2) A handful of hours after said Crocodile show, freshly rocked Posies will leave Seattle for the south of Spain to begin recording a new album for release in 2010, and 3) The Posies will also play all material from said new album @ The Crocodile on 4/17/10 as well. For rizzle! Tickets go on sale online 2/6/10 @ The Crocodile.com.

Nice job, good, on continuing to exist in the world.

Linguists, synapses, take note:

We need a conjugation of "are", "were", and "will be" that applies to the collective and connotes one person is alive and one is dead.

And while I'm making requests, I would appreciate if my subconscious mind stopped prompting me to utter "when we died".

Happy birthday, Mom!

Your intelligence, compassion, empathy, tenacity and wit are awe-inspiring and I love you immeasurably!

Always,
Litz

Toss up:

Unsure which I'd prefer more right now, a haircut or general anesthesia.

Apple unveils new device for those in the deep and early stages of grief:

The iDon'tgiveafuckbutfakeiteffectively.

Spit-wads or Saran Wrap on their toilet seats acceptable substitutes:

I thought last night's State of the Union Address was erudite, pragmatic, inspiring, compassionate, self-aware, and I like that the president threw a few elbows. Could have been more satisfied only if he issued an executive order stating shin-kicking and wedgies inflicted upon Senators Lieberman and Nelson and the five Supreme Court Justices who handed down last week's deplorable campaign finance decision would be legal indefinitely.

Just read that Huffington Post...

...will provide "instant Twitter reaction" to tonight's State of the Union Address. Whew! Close one! For a second I thought I'd have to contemplate and process the president's speech all on my own like a sentient and informed adult.

I read HuffPo frequently, but if they're hellbent on coddling me, might I suggest folding my laundry or making me homemade lasagna instead.

Just doing my part (except for the elitist thing):

Skipped the NFL playoffs yesterday in favor of the Michelangelo exhibit at the Seattle Art Museum, which was surprisingly packed, then headed across the street to Fran's Chocolates, where three women discussed vegan pancake recipes at length.

The city's rep as lefty-elitist-gay-loving-bookworms? Secured for time being.

Yin, yang. Whatever:

As I knew would occur after the initial "protective" phase passed, this week I received both the most thoughtless question and most inane email since he died, from two vastly different sources, neither of whom have been through this. (Which is still no excuse: we're not kids. In each instance, the messages were deeply idiotic, almost comically so, and will undoubtedly find their way into my future work.)

On the flip side, today I received some of the kindest and most practical insight from one who has lived through this and then some. And it helped tremendously.

As I've written of here and elsewhere repeatedly, in the aggregate, I've been profoundly fortunate in that I've been surrounded by incredibly loving, ceaselessly thoughtful family, friends, and colleagues. As for the few but vocal members of the moron brigade, to crib the Ben Franklin line, death and taxes. Like it or not, dumbfucks, your turn is coming. Also, I'm fully aware this isn't my last go-round on this particular ride.

As one of my close friends and I keep reiterating, as cheesy as it sounds, what gets us through this is love and, in our cases, our art, too.

So thank you again so much to each individual who has helped tamp down the fires of this particular hell. Re the others, well, I think I've made my point.

Today's NYT follow-up piece with Dr. Nancy Klimas, who serves on the board of the International Association of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome:

Dr. Nancy Klimas, recognized internationally as one of the leading Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction Syndrome researchers, answers another round of questions in today's New York Times. (She fielded different readers' questions last month.)

Dr. Klimas again does an outstanding job distilling complicated research findings into laypersons' terms while maintaining both medical objectivity and compassion. No mean feat:

http://consults.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/01/21/hiv-fibromyalgia-and-chronic-fatigue-syndrome/?ref=health

And while many of the NYT commenters are smart and/or have CFIDS themselves, as per usual w/ anything internet (or human) based, there is some startling misinformation in the comments section, including that CFIDS patients' blood work returns normal, that it is merely a question of food allergies (I eliminated the foods I'm allergic to years ago), or that CFIDS is simply indicative of "normal aging". (I was in a wheelchair for four months at age 24 and again at 34; pediatric CFIDS has been extensively researched and documented.)

Refreshingly honest and deeply compelling exploration of...

...love, loss, grief, art, belief, and the intersection of all of the above in a new Patti Smith interview with Chris Kornelis of the Seattle Weekly. Via my friend, Caryn Rose:

http://blogs.seattleweekly.com/reverb/2010/01/qa_patti_smith.php